I typed that up on the quick, I wonder if there was any spelling mistakes I didn't even check, it was the wording and how she came across with this work for her age, she writes like an adult !!, her stories are amazing how she can just sit there in a short space of time and write something like that, I probably did many moons ago, and probably if I put my mind to it could again, but with age comes the stark reality of our old grey matter not as good as it used to be...lol
Thanks hun for that, Bec will probably moan at me for putting it up...lol, but she really lacks self confidence, even in cadets as well, she says she is going to fail etc, she was told last night in no uncertain terms that she was being stupid...lol, that she is really good and doesn't seem to see it
The most important things when writing are spelling and punctuation and this piece looks fine to me hun.
If Becs is really interested in writing I recommend a book called Creative Writing. It's an easy guide on how to write books, short stories, verse etc. Or Google in Creative Writing and there are loads of websites out there.
Ladies I need your honest opinion, Bec has wrote this and this is her homework that has to be graded, she thinks it's rubbish, but to me it's really good, she has talent which she is ignoring, I need you guys to make her see that she has real talent and not to be ashamed of it....
Here is the story that she wrote
Deceiving by Rebeca
My name is Dylan James, and I am invisible to those who see me...
I could see her , in every way that eyes could see. The bright azure colour that her iris beholds, the smokey rings underneath her porcelain like face. She sat in the far back, the east end of the library, where no one could possibly see her. She suspected that I didn't notice her sitting there, but in all truth, she saw me too.
Don't think I can't see you, young man."
I didn't think that at all" I placed the book on the counter and smiled "May I have this book?"
I glanced wearily behind my shoulder, practically un-noticable to seeking eyes but, she was gone.
I grabbed the book and left without a reply. You think you're special: There was a difference, between thinking and being. I knew I was special, I was the one who can get into trouble, and vanish without andy recollection of anything, I was the one who could speak without even moving my lips, I was the one who could see with no open eyes. I was different and no one begged to differ.
You're like me you know. I turned withou a thought of who it was
How do you know that? I answered, I can be completely different from you assumptions.
"Because you saw me, You were watching me in that library. You can see me. "She continued to walk, brushing the palm of her hand against my cheek, she was cold but yet she was warm against my own skin. The train of black satin followed her, creating a pathway of broken snow away from me.
The time I had arrived, the snow had ceased to nothing but dripping water. The lights were out but I knew they were home. It was crisp inside, like the fire had ceased to nothing but a flicker of bright lights in the living room, they were home, managing to keep the house under control from the accumlating snow outside. It was silent, depsite the sound of the children dreams upstairs.
I walked passed the hallway mirror, refusing to look, i was scared, intimidated frightened of what could be looking back at me in the darkness. I stood solemnly on the hallway, staring across to Maddie's Bedroom door. It seemed to have altered, aged even to something more than just a twelve year old's bedroom, It was as if the universe had spun a thousand tinmes over. and she was nothing but a aged women. Her bedroom had assumed that
The lights switched on, drawing the last of my breath away. Maddie's bedroom door opened. she stepped on to the threashold, rubbing her hands gently through her tussled curls. She stared blankly at me, as if she was watching right through me.
I miss you Dylan" she sighed, rubbing her eyes slowly. I opened my arms, waiting for my little sister to run and greet me, but she never did...
, I wonder if there was any spelling mistakes I didn't even check, it was the wording and how she came across with this work for her age, she writes like an adult !!, her stories are amazing how she can just sit there in a short space of time and write something like that, I probably did many moons ago, and probably if I put my mind to it could again, but with age comes the stark reality of our old grey matter not as good as it used to be...lol
